Five years ago this month, back in January 2008, during my annual appraisal, my manager at work first suggested I think about completing a PhD. It's something I'd never even considered until that day. I'd always intended to complete a Masters Degree in Counselling, but hadn't gotten round to it ... & yet suddenly, I was contemplating the idea of a PhD!
It's been a hugely interesting journey since then and I can’t believe that this has been such a big part of my life for five years; that’s a long time! And yet, in many ways, those five years have flown by. So much has happened to me and the people in my life during those five years; loved ones have come and gone, new adventures have been lived and are now just memories, new learnings have taken root both within and with-out my research. The PhD has been the one constant throughout it all.
And five years on, here I am at the start of my writing up period. I’ve learned so much over the past five years; much of which I think I’ll only fully appreciate as I begin the long process of putting it all down on paper. It’s an exciting time for me; time when all of my reading, thinking and data collection finally comes together. Right now, it’s all scattered across numerous books, various computer files, and, of course, all around my brain! This is the year, I pull it all together, process it finally and produce the (hopefully!) sense-making thesis.
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| Scattered workings of a PhD |
There have been times over the last five years, when I’ve doubted myself and wondered why I ever embarked on such a huge project. Times when I’ve felt privileged to be talking to many of my research participants. Times when I’ve felt hugely excited and the new learnings, connections and discoveries I was making. Times when I’ve not been able to see my way through it, out of it, under it; times when I’ve felt completely lost within the forest of knowledge.
And here I am now, seeing daylight and feeling freedom. I’m at the edge of the trees & ahead of me is a beautiful open meadow, which I’ve stepped on to today when I typed up my thesis title page … 153 words down, just another 99,847 to go!!
I know that although I’m now walking through the open meadow, there are going to be many storms ahead. I have no doubt that I have frustrating, doubting and disheartening days ahead of me when the storm clouds descend; I also know though that there will be many exciting, enlightening and satisfying days too full of sunshine.And right now, the sun is shining, and I’m full of excited anticipation as I wonder just how my thesis will turn out and what I will find in there.
Please come along with me as I begin my journey across Thesis Meadow …
